Basic HTML Version
summer
2012
maskmatters.org
59
All in the FAmily
story // Benji Lu and emily sun
u
s.A.T. (student Awareness Tools) were developed and produced by students at Torrey Pines High school in san Diego, Calif.
A
ccording to a 2010 study by the Kaiser Family Foundation,
children spend an average of 54.6 hours per week on their
electronic devices. Compared to another study by the A.C.
Nielsen international polling firm, however, they only spend about
38.5 minutes per week in meaningful conversations with their parents.
Although the general trend may be that children are
spending less time with their families, Torrey Pines High
School sophomore Cori Tate allots her time differently.
Between school, basketball practices and church, she still
finds 12 to 13 hours per week to spend with her family.
“We try to have family movie night and go out to eat
every Sunday,”Tate says. “My favorite part is all the memories
that we make. We crack jokes at each other; it’s fun.”
Quality, Not QuaNtity
According to Lisa Davidson, a family therapist in Poway, Calif.,
it is important that teenagers maintain a healthy relationship with
their families to develop support
networks and build their identities.
There is no definite amount
of time one needs to spend to
gain these benefits, however.
“It’s quality, not quantity.That’s
the main gist,” Davidson says. “It’s
the quality of interaction with kids
that’s fundamental, especially when
they become teenagers. You want
to have your friendship time, but
it’s very important that [teenagers]
share problems or accomplishments
so that [they] can develop [their]
self-confidence for the future.”
Nonetheless, counselors, parents and children alike recognize
that family members spend less time together as the children grow
older and become more involved in activities outside of the family.
uNder Pressure
“For [high school students], there’s an enormous amount of
pressure and stress,” says Solano Beach, Calif., family therapist
David Christopher. “Parents are often pushing and encouraging
their children to get strong grades and to participate in
extracurricular activities. But we oftentimes forget how really
important it is to stay very close and stay very involved.”
Lauren*, a student at Torrey Pines High School, has observed
this trend in her own family. Although she’s an only child, [she
says] it’s difficult for her parents, both of whom work, to reconcile
their own busy schedules with hers, which includes competing on
the school academic team, as well as the speech and debate team,
taking rigorous courses and volunteering at a local science center.
“Family used to be the most important, but high school has
kind of changed that,” Lauren says. “It’s not like another thing to
do, but it’s not like anything I think is super important right now.”
FrieNds over Family
Indeed, Lauren perceives the general student population
to be indifferent to family time, as friends, schoolwork, sports
and other obligations demand students’ attention. Some,
however, have set their priorities differently
because they are in different circumstances.
“I’d rather hang out with my friends than hang
out with my family, but with going to college soon, it’s
probably a bit more of a priority recently,” says, Andrei
Anashkin, a senior at Torrey Pines High School.
Whether they have busy schedules or
not, some simply find that spending time
with their families isn’t always pleasant.
“I usually enjoy the things we do over the
weekends, like playing board games and watching
movies. But when my mom barges in every so often,
that’s more like an obligation,” Anashkin says.
For others, the unpleasantness of
spending time with their families can
even impede their relationships with them.
“My family and I spend maybe two hours per week
together,”Torrey Pines High School student Rachel* says.
“[When we spend time together], we’re usually just watching
the same TV. I probably should spend more time with them,
but we don’t get along as well as we should; we’re just different
people. Sometimes we try to go out to dinner together, and
then we just end up arguing and having a bad time.”
“Family used
to be the most
important, but
high school
has kind of
changed that…”
S.A.T. (Student Awareness Tools) is designed to give
students a voice on important issues facing them
today. By explaining how their world looks and feels,
they can show how students have dealt with, overcome
or been empowered by their experience. To have your
school considered for an upcoming issue, contact
Michelle Jacoby at
mjacoby@maskmatters.org
.
Get Involved!
To hear what more teens are saying, visit
maskmatters.org/engage/at-home/blog
.
Do you want your voice heard? If so, MASK’s
S.A.T. Committee is looking for members. For
information, e-mail
info@maskmatters.org
.
S.A.T.:
What it’s
all about
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S.A.T. (Student
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